Reclaiming My Life

Reclaiming My Life

So many of you have reached out that I thought it was time for an update.

I love to write, but life has presented a few unexpected detours.

For years, I was a full-time caregiver for my lovely mother. As her needs increased, my writing time steadily decreased. Then came Covid. For two years, we barely left home.

When Mom passed away, I needed time to regroup. Unplugging my phone became my favorite pastime.

I began to work on revisions for my first three books. As a self-taught graphic designer, I do everything myself, and every step takes time.

I decided to increase the page count of each book by decreasing the trim size. That meant each page had to be reformatted. Changing the page count also changed the spine width, so each cover had to be resized. Rather than simply resize them, I took the opportunity to give them a fresh look. Thanks to the golden talent of artist Terrence Kennedy—whom many of you know—the covers look so much more refined.

My creativity flourished until I was diagnosed with breast cancer. As I’ve shared before, that diagnosis was like having a stop sign thrust in front of me. Healing took precedence. Once again my writing projects were on hold.

Fast forward a year and a half. Thankfully, my mammograms have shown no signs of cancer. I am slowly reclaiming my life and back to working on my books full time.

I recently printed out all three manuscripts for a final read-through. Next, I will proof the interiors and resize the book covers. 

From there, I had planned to shift my book distribution from Lightning Source to Ingram Spark, and once that was in place, to upload my book revisions to Ingram. However, that changed yesterday when I discovered that once you change the trim size of a book, you can no longer do a revision. You need to assign the book a new ISBN# and register it as a new title. So, there’s that.

Adjustments aside, I now plan to open an account with Ingram Spark for the print book distribution. Plus, I will reformat the books and covers as eBooks using Atticus software. Then, I will set them up on KDP Amazon.

Why? If you are exclusive with KDP eBook distribution for at least 90 days, KDP allows you to give your eBooks away for free for 5 days of your choice. I like that.

Once these projects are finalized, I will focus on my next three books. One is my first work of fiction inspired by a dream. Such a fun project. 

Thank you for your patience, your encouragement, and for staying with me through this journey. More updates soon!

Soul Travel

Soul Travel

It’s 1965. My best friend Beverly lives next door. She and I are sitting on our porch playing jacks.

A girl a few years older than us walks by snapping her gum while holding a transistor radio to her ear. It’s loud enough to hear the music, Johnny Angel, How I love him … every time he says hello my heart begins to fly

“Aren’t you two a little old to be playing jacks?” she asks.

We ignore her and she walks away.

“If someone told me a spaceship dropped me off and I’d been sent here to save humanity, I’d believe them.” I say.

“I know what you mean,” says Beverly, who reminds me of a painting with her beautiful fawn colored eyes.

“Aren’t you going into the city today to meet your boyfriend?” she asks.

His name is Paul. He’s nineteen and plays in a band. Paul lives in the Bronx and I live in Queens, so sometimes we meet in Manhattan and sit under a tree in Central Park and kiss. He told me he loves me.

“Yes, I am going into the city today. Better go get ready,” I reply.

My mother comes to the window of our downstairs apartment, a few feet away from where we’re sitting, “Want a grilled cheese sandwich and apple juice?”

“Thanks mom. I’ll be right in. See you later Bev.”

After I eat, I walk past rows of two-story brick buildings that all look the same. Then I cross the overpass of the Long Island Expressway and arrive at the bus stop.

There is no bench, so I lean against the wall to wait. The sun warms my face.

Suddenly my body feels lighter.

I see a girl leaning against a wall. That’s me! No. That’s not me. I’m me, the one looking at her. I get it. The girl at the bus stop is the form my soul has taken this lifetime.

In a blink, I look out from behind the eyes of a fourteen-year-old girl waiting for a bus. It just stopped in front of her. I mean me. It just stopped in front of me, since I am her.

I go up the bus stairs, drop the fare into the coin box, take a window seat, and stare out at the blue sky. Was I floating? What is going on?

Twenty minutes later, the bus route ends at a corner store near the subway entrance. I buy a Twix and put it in my purse for later. Then I head down the steep staircase, where I am greeted by florescent lights, white tiled walls, and the familiar sound of train wheels screeching on metal tracks.

I get on line to buy a token. “Two please. No make it three.” I’ll get one for the way back and one for the bus ride home. I push my money through the little slot on the counter, the only opening in the mini-fortress the token lady sits in.

She pushes three tokens back through the slot without raising her head. If you look up, you might see my soul. I just did. Or rather, my soul saw me. Not quite sure how that works yet. You have a soul too. Is it in there with you?

 “Next,” she yells.

The train from Queens to Manhattan is only half full, so there are plenty of seats. That’s good. Don’t like when it’s crowded. People press up against me, and some of them are men. I wonder how our souls feel pressed together like that. Do souls feel? They must, mustn’t they?

Several riders read books or newspapers. A few wear headphones and hold portable tape players. Most wear the glazed facial expression every New Yorker knows that says, “I don’t care what you think of me.” Does that mean they don’t care? Or does it mean they do care and want people to think they don’t?

The train jolts forward, and the lights flicker. It doesn’t bother me. I’m used to it. Maybe I’ll eat half my Twix now and save the rest for the way home. My soul and I settle in for the forty-minute ride to Manhattan.

A Life Well Lived

A Life Well Lived

My mother was a true earth angel. When she lived in New York, in addition to being a devoted wife and mother, she volunteered at an orphanage. She was an active member of Cancer Care, spending hours compiling their newsletter with a manual typewriter and plenty of whiteout. She made weekly phone calls to shut-ins, people whose disabilities prevented them from leaving their homes. She visited the Veteran’s Hospital regularly and Creedmoor, a large facility for the mentally impaired. She volunteered at a local public school tutoring children in math and language skills. And she was a civil rights activist committed to freedom and equality. As a child I recall standing with her in a packed auditorium singing “We Shall Overcome” led by Martin Luther King.

When she moved to Florida after my father passed, mom immersed herself in meaningful activities. A gifted singer, she’d performed for the troops in World War II and in Vaudeville. With her life-long passion for singing, she joined the Choraleers and was a regular at Marie’s Sing-A-Long. She attended Temple B’nai Shalom, arriving early each week to set up refreshments, going on to receive their Woman of the Year Award. She joined a group that visited local residents who were hospitalized until the Privacy Act interrupted their visits. She was a member of Jewish War Veterans and We Care, going on weekly visits to those in need of companionship. She often encouraged people to attend bereavement support groups. If they were hesitant to go alone, she would go with them. She was an active member of the Democratic Club, making calls to encourage others to vote well into her nineties. For seven years, she volunteered several days a week at Focal Point Pre-school with children ages 4-5 yrs., taking the bus at 9:00 am each morning and returning by the same route each afternoon. When the school decided she was a fall risk because of her advanced age, she and her friends began to sing for Alzheimer’s patients. (They called themselves Bea’s Bunch, and they called her Honey Bea.) After each performance, using her walker mom would go around the room and hug each of the participants. That was her favorite part. She did it until she was 99 years old.

When Hurricane Wilma hit in 2005, there was plenty to be distressed about living on the fourth floor. The roof was damaged. When it rained outside, it rained inside. Along with many of neighbors, for weeks we had no electricity. No refrigeration. No cooking. No air conditioning. Throughout it all, she focused on what she had to be grateful for. If something was broken, she was grateful for whatever she had that wasn’t.

Bea Rosner did not know how to look down. She only knew how to look up. Her satisfaction came from knowing she made a difference in someone else’s life, knowing that a caring word or gesture, no matter how big or small, brought a smile or a ray of hope. When she went to bed at night, her heart was full because she shared it. In the morning she was ready to begin again, spreading kindness wherever she went. Her legacy? In over a century she never said an unkind word about anyone.

My mother, Beatrice, passed peacefully in her home in Deerfield Beach, Florida on February 17,2022 with my brother and I by her side. For several days prior to her passing, she appeared to be in a trancelike sleep with her eyes tightly closed. Yet even in that withdrawn state, using what little energy she had, she raised her arms high up in the air and waved them around with a big smile from ear to ear. A gesture she repeated over and over and over.

To an observer, it was obvious she was communicating with someone. Perhaps it was her loving husband, or her mother and father, or her sisters and brother, or one of the many family members and friends who departed before her, coming to welcome her home. A mystical reminderwe will all be united with our loved ones when heaven calls.

Anita Moorjani

Anita Moorjani

Have you heard the inspiring Anita Moorjani tell her dramatic and moving personal story about how she was on the brink of dying when she had a miraculous healing? It is one of the most exceptional stories in that Anita’s experience was medically documented. For believers, that may not be necessary. But for those viewers who still question the role of the divine, it can be very affirming. I like that Anita subtitles her website “Remember Your Magnificence.”

 

Communing

Communing

My 101-year-old mother was the youngest of four children born of Russian immigrants, she was the only child at home when her siblings married and she grew very close to her parents.

I know she misses them dearly and often remind her that she will be reunited with her mother and her father when she passes.

One Mother’s Day, she and I were sitting on a bench overlooking a small lake. I said, “Would you like to speak with your mother now?”  

She nodded, and I gave her the same simple directions I share in my book, When Souls Take Flight

As she closed her eyes and began to follow the directions I’d given her, I sat watching a lone duck splashing in the water.

Within a few minutes, I sensed my grandmother’s presence. I was around five years old when she departed, but I still remember the love in her eyes when she looked at me and the comfort of her arms when she held me.

Then she spoke to me. “Tell your mother she is still my baby,” she said. 

I got a little teary eyed and nodded. 

A short time later mom opened her eyes. “Grandma spoke to me,” I said. “She asked me to tell you that you are still her baby.” 

“I’m older than she was when she died,” said mom.  

“I don’t think it works that way,” I replied. “You are still her baby.”

“And you are still her diamond.” 

 

 

 

Spiritual Sisters

Spiritual Sisters

A dear friend and client recently transitioned. I thought I would share something I wrote to her before she passed.

I first met Norma at an art show where she displayed her refined sculptures, but I was familiar with her profound teachings long before that. My mother had taken Norma’s “Negative to Positive” class many times and listened to Norma’s healing CD “A Unique Meditation Experience” every morning. I practically knew it by heart.

A year passed before I saw Norma again. At 88 yrs. she published her first book, “The Miracle Years” and was told she needed a website. She had no idea what that was, so she did what she always did. She asked God for guidance.

The following day Norma called and said I had come to her in a dream. She asked if I knew what a website was and if I could build one for her. I had made my own website but had never built one for someone else. I told her I would try, and that began our mutual love affair.

Four years later, Norma and her beloved daughter came to my mother’s 97th birthday party. They arrived after everyone left, which gave the four of us some quality time together. True to form, Norma was beautifully groomed and concerned about our hurricane preparations. We all parted with warm hugs.

The following morning Norma suffered a stroke with serious consequences. While in Hospice care, I sent the following letter to her devoted daughter who read it to Norma several times before she gently transitioned.

Dearest Norma,

We are more than friends, more than spiritual sisters. We are family. I love you dearly and am forever grateful you came into my life when you did. You live in my heart now. Nothing that changes in either of our journeys will ever change that.

God loves all his children well, but he chose you for a special mission. He chose you because of your beautiful evolved soul, your expanded radiant heart, and your profound depth of insight into humanity. He chose you because of your generous kind nature and your ability to lift others. He chose you to stand in his place like a cosmic mirror reflecting the light of truth, so in the purity of your presence people can see their real purpose as souls incarnated on Earth.

And you my darling friend have fulfilled your mission so well, planting celestial seeds of understanding that continue to flower in the countless lives who have awakened and transformed from your nourishing healing CD, your heartfelt book, your enriching metaphysical classes, and your day-to-day teachings on the power of the mind and the importance of being positive. You have given and given and given like the regal graceful warrior you are. Can you feel the gratitude surrounding you?

When the time comes for God to open his loving arms to call you home, he is planning a big celebration to welcome you with all your dear ones ready to embrace your glowing essence as choirs of angels sing in your honor. If you listen closely you may hear them now, readying for the return of one of divinity’s favorite metaphysical teachers of light. The strong, courageous, golden-hearted Dr. Norma Locker.